PEOPLE WHO MAKE EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEIR STATUSES ON FACEBOOK A TEXT POST FROM TUMBLR AND THEN PRETEND LIKE THEY CAME UP WITH IT MAKE ME SO MAD
are you fucking kidding me i literally JUST posted this
like yeah cool we follow each other but when are we gonna date
At Stanford there was this Professor who was a total bitch and she taught British Literature, which was cool. Except she taught only her opinions of the books and it didn’t help me as a writer. I went to school to learn new things to improve my craft, not have someone else’s opinions carved onto my forehead.
So anyway, for our final project, she asked us to write a ten page paper on why the color symbolism in Othello was so significant. I did some research and it turned out that she did her entire graduate thesis on this very subject. I was mad. This wasn’t teaching, this was boosting her ego. SO I wrote a ten page essay on why color symbolism in Othello wasn’t significant, satirizing it to the point of no return, saying that her opinion was an opinion and shouldn’t be taken seriously.
SHe failed me, needless to say. So in retaliation, I responded by baking a batch of brownies laced with weed and laxatives and delivered them myself to the professor hours before her big graduation speech. I told her that it was a peace offering, my way of apologizing and asking if I could do anything to fix my grade.
She refused to fix my grade.
In the end, she shit herself on stage.
I didn’t regret it.
what if obama does the ice bucket challenge and nominates queen elizabeth
what if obama actually talks about what’s going on in ferguson
what if obama stopped exterminating the middle eastern population with drones
what if obama lowered my gotdamn tuition
What if everyone gets educated and stops acting like the President can make decisions for the country by themselves
Imagine your OTP at the altar of a church, about to get married. Just as they’re about to kiss, Person A wakes up in bed, sobbing and staring at the empty space beside them. In reality, Person B died years ago.
WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU
oh but there’s no need to imagine
also it works both ways
WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS
accidentally forgetting your earbuds at home is like accidentally leaving your first born child at the gates of hell